My Family is Dope

Before I start this post I want to say that the titles of my blog posts are now gonna be songs that remind me of what I'm writing about. I'll also start posting pics which will be mega cool so you guys know that you aren't being catfished.

So this post is going to be about the people who make my life better. The people who inspire me to be a better person and at the same time keep me grounded and confident in who I am.

These are the ride or dies. The homies. The crew. I don't know how I was so lucky to find people who love me the way these guys do but I did. So without further ado and in no particular order, here are my besties.

We'll start with the original homies, my family. I'll probably end up doing an entire post about how cool my mom is so for now I'll just talk about my sister Brynn.

Brynn



If you know me and Brynn you will also know that this photo describes us perfectly. I think that my relationship with my sister is something that I cherish so much because of what I had to struggle through to get it.

I used to think that Brynn and I were opposites in every single sense of the word. I mean, she is girly, I am not. I love football, she loves One Direction.

Brynn was not kind to me as a child. In fact, I lost my first tooth when Brynn tried to put makeup on me and in the process, ripped my tooth out. We would play teacher but unsurprisingly, I never got to be the teacher.

After high school Brynn moved out and for once in our lives we actually got along. Now I call Brynn on the regular and actually care about her opinion... Who knew?

I've Never Been So Nervous

Anyone who knows me know that I love Advertising. I think it's the coolest thing in the world. This Friday, I will apply to the creative track within the advertising program. I don't think that I've ever been so nervous for anything in my entire life.

I mean, it's not like my whole future is at stake or anything. Right? I know that whoever is reading this probably doesn't really care about whether or not I am admitted into this program.

Despite this, I am going to talk about my problems with you the way I talk about them with others, assume that you care when you clearly don't. 

I have HELLA papers due in the next two weeks. I also have my portfolio due. In every sense of the word I am freaking. But over the last couple of days I've realized something. Everything will work out. It will all be fine. I'm so blessed to be where I am, to be with the people I love.

There are girls in third-world countries who have to fight tooth and nail to be able to go to school, to vote, to be the best that they can be.

If the worst thing that is happening in my life is that I am stressed, I am blessed. Whoops, that rhymed. My bad. I know that I'm cheesy but I'm not THAT cheesy.

Tonight I called my mom and I ended the call saying how stressed I was. My mom has a knack for making me feel dumb by showing me how dumb I am being. She said "Charlotte, if I can be a single mother of four for 11 years, you can do this."

And I know I can. So, if I can quote the great Drake...

WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY UP. I feel blessed.

Good Old Fashioned Fun

I love humor. I love jokes and laughing and watching videos of babies covered in peanut butter. Recently though, I have noticed a slightly disturbing trend in social media. Humor now seems like a contest between who can make fun of someone in the most unique way. 

Someone in the media that refuses to operate that way is Ellen Degeneres. Ellen is hilarious, but never at other people's expense. I love how kind she is.

The other day I was doing what I always do. Watching YouTube videos of Ellen interviewing inspirational people and doing inspirational things, and I got caught in what I like to call an "Ellen Wormhole."

I probably watched about four hours of Ellen before I realized that it was 2 A.M. and I had school in six hours.

It was awesome though because I went to bed feeling happy, inspired even. When I see people doing kind things and promoting pure and unadulterated happiness I feel good. I hope that everyone can feel like this at least once a day.

This clip shows that Ellen is the bomb. Also if you've never seen Kate McKinnon on SLN you need to watch her. She is hilarious. Hopefully you can try to find your own "Ellen." Because this one is taken. By me. 

Come On America.

If there is one thing that I can't STAND in this screwed up world it's racism. I've never really gotten the point of it, I guess.

Like, "You're less than me because your skin is darker?" It just doesn't make sense. I love going to BYU and I love this gospel, but sometimes I feel like there's this sinister feeling here. That, "I am better than you" feeling. Sometimes I feel like it stems from race.

My mother always taught me that I don't deserve anything. The world has no obligation to me. I think that attitude has truly changed the way I look at things. So when I hear someone in class say "I hate that they are still letting Muslims into America" it bugs me. A lot.

My favorite thing about this gospel stems from "As I have loved you, love one another." Sometimes I feel like we forget that. Well not on my watch.

I saw a post today that was DRIPPING with racism. I didn't know how to respond. For a second I thought about doing nothing, but then I remembered a quote from Albert Einstein.

So I did what I do best, I got myself in trouble. I know that the internet is not usually the place to take a stand. I know that someone won't see an internet comment and decide to change their opinion on race.

Despite this, I don't know what else to do. I want to change the world. And if the way I do it is through naive Facebook posts then SO BE IT.

Obviously I am going to make sure that I try to stop hated and injustice in all aspects of my life, not just online.

In the coming weeks, I am going to make sure that I reach out to those different from me so they can feel my love, and the love of the Savior.

Sooooooooooooooo peace. Peace out brotha.

It's Magic.

When I was fourteen I was lucky enough to fall in love with a TV show called “Chuck” that had amazing music in it. As I watched the show I began to realize that though I loved the show and it’s characters it was the music in it that really impacted me.

Suddenly something inside of me changed. I started to realize how music made me feel. How it made me ache. How it made me cry. How it could bring me the highest of highs and the lowest of lows.I remember feeling really free when I first fell in love with music. I was 14 but for some reason I felt like my soul was 100 years old.

Music let me feel things I had never felt, see things that I had yet to experience. The first song I ever fell in love with was Skinny Love by Bon Iver. I distinctly remember listening to this song for about a week straight…ok maybe like a month. Music is in my blood. It makes me feel deeply and it is something that I am grateful for everyday. My favorite lyric in the song is:

“And I told you to be patient

And I told you to be fine

And I told you to be balanced

And I told you to be kind” 

For some reason this spoke to me more than anything in my life ever really has. And THAT right there is why I love music. In my mind one of the most intimate things that someone can do is to bear their soul in song. That may sound cheesy or cliche but it’s true.

That is why I love writing music. Because though I know I will never be famous and that I will never have thousands of fans screaming my name, I do know that I will always have the feeling that playing and listening to music gives me. The feeling that there is something bigger than myself, and that I can do incredible things.

My Favorite Picture on the Internet.

This picture makes me a better (and fatter) person. I saw this my freshmen year and thought that it was the funniest thing I have ever seen. I hope you enjoy it too.

Every single time I feel sad or down, I look at this picture and it makes me laugh. It also makes me feel really, really hungry.

Internet humor is by far my favorite type of humor. I love how dumb it is. Sometimes I can't help but get caught up in the "adultness" of my life. It's nice to laugh at something dumb every once in a while.

I Am

I am impenetrable. I am building walls and then breaking them down only to build them up bigger. Stronger.

I am water tight. No tears escape my muddy eyes except on on anniversaries of days purposefully forgotten.

I am a steady hand. Or maybe I'm only steady when other people are watching.

I'm indecisive. No maybe I'm not.